OPEN
THE HUMAN MIND is the most spectacular creation I’ve ever come in contact with, its creativity, emotions, spontaneity, and how different it is from one soul to another.
Amaka was brash, loud, sassy, and what people would consider “rude”, no one wanted to be around her and frankly she didn’t care, she’d stare at her haters and admirers alike and be her authentic self with her head held high.
The wallflower was Mary, she observed Amaka because she was intrigued, she wanted to dislike her too like the rest, but her mind couldn’t help but wonder, Amaka had friends, out of many that didn’t like her, many loved her too, she looked closely and saw, behind all her bravado she was defensive, open and frankly quite relatable, you didn’t need to be interesting when you were with her, her imperfections were laid out plain and made you feel more human being with her.
Mary observed those who didn’t like her too, the things they had to say about her were unflattering, and she’d never say it to their faces but they were just as imperfect, and how bold they were in their dislike made them much worse.
How we think makes us unique, and how we think towards others makes us better or worse.
To have an open mind doesn’t mean we accept all things as they are, some things do need to be protested against and some things need change, like the killing of twins prevented by Mary slessor and the end sars protest against police brutality, out of these two the former was much more permanent than the latter, we still battle ourselves in Nigeria, on our streets, in our offices and in our homes, the unity in diversity means nothing, because your tribe makes you who you are, and we have refused to see each other with an open mind which might just be enough for that “peace” and “better Nigeria” we are all lied to about every 4 years.
A structure has been put in place, and would require quite a force to pull it down, who hasn’t wept for this country, for jungle justice on the innocent and guilty alike, killings because of Envagelism because one thing or another is an abomination, burning down of churches or even just giving attitude and bad service because someone is younger and more wealthy than you are.
But I’ll give us some credit, we do unite when one of ours does something so incredible it captures the western worlds attention, anything to prove to those “whites” or other African countries that we have more than they think we do, than we think we do, like the crazy support for Hilda baci and her cook-a-thon and the African cup of nations.
Back to my story, Mary understood that perfection wasn’t to be a goal, but understanding each person and respecting their values was a lesson she planned on taking, you shouldn’t accommodate anyone if you couldn’t, personal peace also mattered, so she tried to find a Goldilocks zone. And asking her father in heaven, God I mean, she had a eureka moment. And that was balance, make friends with those who have values that aligns with hers so compromising wasn’t an option, and most importantly having an open mind towards people who she didn’t understand, she stopped defending bad character but instead looked behind the curtain to see causes of such bad character and know how to approach such people without prejudice.
People hate without cause, it’s a thing, when we have a full idea of someone from another mouth and we approach such people with a mindset that has been drawn up by another person and not our unique minds, and if we depend on this method of introduction, we’ll continue to be the same without even knowing it.
It’s high time for individual change, we don’t have to see eye to eye, but seeing the bigger picture, a united class, a united school, and maybe one day a united country. Our gossips don’t make us better than the subject, and our silence sometimes doesn’t make us better either, remember “the balance”. We are individuals, with unique minds, that can think up wars, strive, selfish thoughts, but also art, community, peace, and love because as the Bible says “love conquers all”.
The human mind is spectacular, created by God, he wants us to think up beautiful things, and grow and advance, and be open towards the person next to us, and be helpful even when it’ll bring us no gain, and also fight, when we have been violated, and when some things should never be ignored.
According to the Oxford dictionary, “ to be open minded is to be willing to consider new ideas ; unprejudiced, tolerant”, and I’ll add mine “To love and care about the next person enough to consider their being”.
Arigidi Joy Oyiza